With guts spewed, heart on the mend, anger subsiding, forgiveness growing, love catapulting, energy rekindling, creativity colouring and my mind de-fogging life is looking up.Over time the unpleasant to and fro of emotional chaos and spiritual depletion played out on physical health have near dislodged me. Certainly kicked me off my massive VICTORY perch.
But he is back!!!!
Waking this morning that little voice was loud and clear. After 3 months of finding my way back to my authenticity it is nice to be seeing a glimmer of ME again.
Yes I searched for a replacement human for my ex….I HATE BEING SINGLE….but sadly as it mostly does in my sub-culture of society came up ‘business-as-usual’…lies, sordid and far from love. Couples sharing the bedroom….singles seeking intimacy but selling sexual pleasure instead. But anyhow, I guess, as I always do hope for that 1 moment with 1 person that becomes a love affair and harbour against rough seas. (Sjoe that sounded very Mills and Boons’ish…..maybe a potential new creative opportunity….lol)
So as I prep myself to take a quiet seat back in church I admire the patience that has been displayed in letting me deal with me. I really do appreciate that.
SO AS I EASE MY WAY BACK HOME FROM MONTHS OF SEEKING…..
Easy does it echoes in my heart!!!!
I think that what often people overlook is that technically I am a Christian. Which means I have a real life working relationship with God.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths. Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord , and turn away from evil. It will be healing to your flesh and refreshment to your bones. Honor the Lord with your wealth and with the firstfruits of all your produce; then your barns will be filled with plenty, and your vats will be bursting with wine. My son, do not despise the Lord ‘s discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the Lord reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights.
Proverbs 3:5-12 ESV
So often in life, because we all want to belong and be validated, we kindly but thoughtlessly shower those around us with advice. Sometimes correct….Sometimes less than….
BUT SOMETIMES ALL WE NEED TO BE IS A SHOULDER, EAR, HEART, HAND AND SAFE PLACE.
Luckily for me I do see the good in it all and find my way back home….TRUE LOVE IS HARD TO IGNORE…..LOL.
So with deep thanks and sincere love I thank you all for kindness, adventure, humour, tolerance and best of all being you. For in each of you is a light that glows so spectacularly that it is seducing to say the least….
You have been a FRIEND and have inspired the new adventure of my life…FRIEND SUPPORT GROUP.
U GUYS ROCK!!!!
EASY DOES IT!!!