It is 2:49 am in Johannesburg South Africa. It’s kind of wierd writing this blog naked but the truth is that I am home alone so I shouldn’t care, but I do. Talking about home, if you could see my home right now it is disgusting and embarrassing. I have been so hectic lately, believe me I am not complaining, but I have not had a second to try find the energy to do more. At this point of reaching higher I am too scared too employ someone in my home just in case I fail, so I do ‘Dora the Domestic Goddess’ myself…..lol. So disgusting has to stay disgusting till this afternoon after 13:00 or tomorrow after 12. It is what it is. You ever get like that; too tired to care but care anyway even though you just cannot care enough to do it differently?
I am loving my life for the first time in a long time; years in fact. Not that I didn’t enjoy my time with my ex; I did, thoroughly. But my time now is a time for me to experience myself for myself. No boss to order me around or curb my life. No relationship in which to consider another. Just me and those that I share my life with voluntarily or those that pay for my life. I truly have a blessed life. No I am not rich by superficial standards, nor by financial standards but I am working on it. I am rich in freedom and love……abundantly.
After a short nap and waking up at 23:45 I couldn’t get back to sleep. In these instances I turn to Netflix on my mobile. I watched ‘The Terminal’ with Tom Hanks and Catherine Zeta Jones. I simply loved the concept of the movie. Humanity versus bureaucracy. Gosh, I truly hope humanity can turn a fast becoming dictatorial SA into the foundation of a democratic society our political stalwarts gave their lives for again.
(But I will get to that later, like my home)
‘The Terminal’ has gotten me fired up on all cylinders. I beg two questions from this movie.
- What it must be for females to be considered as flippant and whimsical. Although it is changing.
- Do all the rules we live by actually have real benefits, or are they just bureaucracies that keep power in the hands of its bearer?
The plot: A guy gets stuck in an airport because his country is at war. She chases a man who is using her. They suspect him of anything and make life difficult. He turns out to be an unlikely hero. She keeps making her choices.
We are each faced with choices everyday. Sometimes I make poor choices, but I am trying hard to be hero to myself. A good guy. I identify with this movie in every way. I am sure you do to.
I wish I could say that bureaucracy was outright pathetic but sometimes it is truly necessary. As an example….in SA the ‘Consumer Protection Act’ is deployed to protect the rights of people against malignant business procedures. In hairdressing we are required to explain the process, quote upfront and be transparent in our salons. Some do but most don’t which leave clients sometimes using food money for hair because of poor engagement and sometimes over-charges. I know this to be true as people who sit in my chair often tell me how much they appreciate my honest and ethical business practices. The point is that sometimes bureaucracy can save us from sticky situations. But sometimes a good guy can be stuck in an airport whilst trying to do the honourable thing. Sometimes a law must be broken to save a life. Sometimes I must compromise my pocket as a stylist to achieve a greater goal.
My client Carol was telling me how in some countries passing things down to less fortunate people can be a bureaucratic nightmare as all sorts of certification is required. Sadly a lot of perfectly good and usable stuff gets dumped because of bureaucratic laws. I am both flabbergasted and saddened that we will rather uphold certain practices than look for alternate humane ways to solve issues. I have been handed down things many times in my life and was so grateful for them. I have come frightfully close to ending up on the streets many times in my active addiction days. The generosity of others not only saved my life but showed me enough care to get me to want to save myself.
Sometimes humanity over bureaucracy can save a life.
I am truly thankful for the near 3 years of rehabilitation I had. No; I am not out of the woods completely, and then again may never be. People are at a point where they accept the fact that they cannot invite me for drinks. I cannot drink. I am accepting that alcohol is the door to a disaster waiting to happen.
Besides I kinda like being clean and sober.
Watching the world yet to learn that hangovers are not much fun is quite hilaaaaaaarious.
Being sober minded means a better chance of making better choices.
And at 43, in 9 days time, I don’t have much time left to make wrong choices anymore. Luckily for me I have also learned that materialism is a fleeting and self-defeating practice as enough is hardly ever enough.
I mean how many more times can we reinvent the same thing only to discover that is just looks nicer, functions nicer but essentially does the same thing…like a car for example. And the price of some of them that could feeds thousands of dying people. I mean really.
Yes I agree with finding ways to minimise our destructive carbon footprint.
For me however the issue starts and ends with the individual.
Do we minimise ourselves for the better tomorrow?
Most parents will know what I mean by that. I admire parents because children very quickly teach us egocentric adults to live for them more than ourselves. That is an experience I will never have and one that bureaucracy is still tough to fight. Same sexes raising children.
How does this rambling relate to itself, SA politics and me?
HOW MUCH OF WHAT WE DO DO WE DO FOR OTHERS AT ALL?
What I do know is this. I am exceptionally proud of myself that I am not a racist, sexist, chauvinist, elitist, fascist. That is a helluva lot to defeat in oneself especially if one has grown up in a world where those attitudes exist in overdrive.
Sooooo march on the 7th April I must in protest to a government that seeks to deploy a corrupt self-serving bureaucracy over the hopes of a generation to come and of present. So as a man in a movie must leave an airport,unauthorised, to remain honourable to his cause, so must we break a bureaucracy that destroys rather than upholds an ethical humanity. A humanity that was fought for with ridiculous numbers of horrific casualties.
Most of which I am proud are the females who are considered flippant and whimsical who have chosen to march as well.
After all our stalwarts say it best….
WHEN A COMMUNITY IS BEING HELD HOSTAGE BY A VERY SMALL GROUP OF PEOPLE, THEN REVOLT IS INEVITABLE. CAN WE UNITE IN A TRUE SA FASHION? CAN WE ONCE AND FOR ALL RECONCILE AS THE WARM, FRIENDLY AND LOVING PEOPLE WE ARE KNOWN TO BE. AS THE PEOPLE WHO HAD THE MOST PROGRESSIVE CONSTITUTION IN THE WORLD.
STAY YOUR AMAZING SELF!
• AJB •