Conscious LEADer

What if we could retrace our steps….?

Where regrets could be altered?

History done differently?

In the 🎥 ‘Discovery’ on Netflix this question, amongst others, is addressed. The search for validation and purpose exists in each of us! I have many things that I would undo if I could. However, they are done and I can choose to rectify myself by being different today for the hope of a better tomorrow.

In the book ‘The Secret’, great pains are taken to suggest the power of positive thinking. Although in part true and an essential practice to live by; positive projection must be followed by positive action. It is too easy to be blinded by words/ thoughts of grandeur but our unresolved issues in our heart treat others around us ‘vrot’.

In my 43 years I have seen, and I was guilty too once upon a time, that often people are only nice to those they care for, regard highly, and match their own ‘standards’ whilst brush all else off with disdain.

A fantastic yardstick that I heard in church once is this,”When a person is looking to go into ministry, I often make a dinner reservation at their home and ask the the home-help who they feel about their employer.” RIGHT?!?!?

What about?

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WHAT ABOUT US

GREAT LEADERS SEE THE POTENTIAL IN ALL PEOPLE AND NOT A ‘SUPREMACIST’ FEW.

This article below, is a magnificent yardstick of authentic leadership.

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Shining hero

Richard Branson says it like this:

CLIENTS IN THE SALON, ADORE ME….BECAUSE WHETHER YOU ARE OLDER, YOUNGER, WEALTHY OR NOT; THE SAME MISCHIEVOUS HUMOUR, TRANSPARENCY AND ETHICS APPLY. PEOPLE ALSO KNOW THAT IF YOU ARE MEAN….”HUUUUNEY, KEEP YOUR BUSINESS FOR SOMEONE WHO WILL PUT UP WITH THAT NONSENSE. IT AIN’T WELCOME HERE!”

I have taken great lengths, consciously, to not be surrounded by racists, sexists, elitists or any other ‘ists. I may be generating less capital than I ought to for a stylist of my experience and caliber, but my actions are an honest reflection of my heart. I SLEEP AT NIGHT, WITH A CLEAR CONSCIENCE. DO YOU?

In Illovo Muse center the janitors, and security and I have a nickname for eachother, ‘goshi’.

It is short for Magosha, which means prostitute. I KNOW RIGHT…..LOL. We call eachother this term of endearment because we are honest labourers and not prostituting our hearts or selling our souls to the devil for fame, money or otherwise. Daily we can hold our heads up high because we are loving eachother in spite of difficult circumstances in a real, honest and kind way.

WHAT ARE YOU DOING THAT TREATS OTHERS LIKE A PROSTITUTE, SO THAT YOUR PERSONAL POCKETS ARE LINED?

People are people; not

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CLOWNS

You are not a prostitute, don’t treat others like one.

In my life I have many amazing moments, where random acts of kindness touched me deeply. One of which is when Marina Applebaum then Coleman sponsored a 6 week rehab stint for me to have a chance at fixing my addiction cycles. Even though, I no longer am her hairstylist I still tentatively watch her business developments and work in HIV education. She will always be a hero to me.

Sometimes we all need help. Here is a STUNNING video to help us b generous in loving others. Enjoy!

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LOVING GENEROUSLY

BE AN AMAZING HUMAN, ABOVE ALL ELSE!

A MILLION REASONS EXIST TO HATE EACHOTHER FIND THE 1 000 000 ➕1 2 ❤️

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Million Reasons

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽

AJB•

The huMAN In U spIritUality

We are an incredibly lucky species!

It is long argued that we are on top of the food chain because he have the ability to decipher choice.

‘Jung suggested that the memories and past experience of a man’s ancestors were buried deep inside his psyche (Burger, 2008; Feist & Feist, 2009). Jung called these hand-me-down memories of our ancestors the “collective unconscious,” which he believed was the reason for the universality of themes throughout world religions, mythologies, legends, and other stories. (Burger, 2008; Feist & Feist, 2009). The universality of themes also suggest that Jung was more interested in how people were similar to each other than what made people individually different from one another.’

Quoted from:

Carl Jung’s Concept of Humanity and Theory of Personality, Wesley Meacham

Updated on October 15, 2016

For more on this subject (click⬇️)

CONCEPT OF HUMANITY

HOUSE OF MERCY

BOKSBURG, SOUTH AFRICA

(2004…roughly)

It is here that I chose to become a believer and since have wrestled with faith and humanity…..eish and it is a battle! Marawe haibo!

Part of the 12 Step Recovery program is stepping out of DENIAL, making a MORAL INVENTORY, and ADMITTING TO GOD AND A FELLOW HUMAN the exact nature of our wrongs.

Sweetie, daaaaaarlin’, huuuuuney,babe,angel, captain,boss…..

Herein lies the dilemma….lol! Besides the obvious fact that I was an addict (more to the fact that amphetamines gave me energy to dance for days and thereby make “friends”, than the actual use of the chem’s did & the chemical psychosis was a thrill for my ADHD mind to play),(no I am not endorsing Chem’s…….I hate them with a passion but we are talking openly and plainly). I am gay. I have the ability to, sometimes, see things that others don’t like to think about and I am a darn naughty brat….lol!

What I am trying to say is this: being in a spiritual minority group, a minority sub-culture, and having to stare at others who consider gay weird and spirituality weirder, having to share my life story honestly….see what I mean? I would rather have sung my ‘kumbaya hallelujah’s’ doll!

Over the years, in and out of rehab, recovery and in the salon, I have heard thousands upon thousands of life stories. Have had to receive and give feedback; sometimes accurate and sometimes so far off the mark that one would think that another species of human lived amongst. Like seriously hun!

Which, neatly, brings me to the point. But first I must clarify.

I had an intriguing chinwag with a Muslim client a while ago who pointed out a particular scripture in the Quran. So I have been wrestling, praying and begging for answers from my HIGHER POWER. I say it like this as I am not GOD, ALLAH, BUDDHA,JESUS,YHWH,SHIVA or any other name we have for our VARIOUS religious affiliations. I have my belief which works for my understanding and I respect and honour you yours……please return the respect likewise!!!!!!

(I WILL GO INTO THE DISCUSSION OF QURAN 50:16 A BIT LATER)

By the way….my ADHD…..lol…..THANK YOU TO THE APPROXIMATELY 21000 READERS OF MY BLOG. I know that my blogs are flawed with errors but I am sure you are feeling the ❤️❤️❤️ behind my layman writing! YOU GUYS ROCK!!!!! WOW!!!! INTERNATIONAL READ BLOGGER, this recovering addict and award winning stylist. DANG!!! THANK YOU! ( sorry to say, however, LINKEDIN readers, make up 65% of my readers….catch up lol.) thank u, thk U, THANX BABE!

Ok back to the point…..ok wait a TRUE STORY first…. regarding the point.

(2005….roughly)

After reading , ‘Waking the Dead’, John Eldridge, I dragged myself to the Magaliesberg to meet God. It was an exercise of separating myself from my usual distractions and to commune with GOD. I eventually found an open piece of land, parked my car, and walked up the koppie. Because I looked back to keep an eye out that my car wasn’t being hijacked I tripped. I fell face first onto a rock that the words ‘JESUS THE ROCK’ had been spray painted onto. Yip, I burst into tears! It was like the world got ultra small and I could feel GOD smiling. I chatted for hours to thin air filled with a presence that is beyond logic or words. Since then, I have come to accept that we don’t need to travel to meet GOD, he is in us and all around us. RIGHT?!?!?!?!? I CRAPPED MYSELF….in a cool kinda way! I didn’t have a cellphone or a camera on me at the time so have no pic to show you….wonder if it is still there!….mmmm)

Magaliesberg Mountains

(pic borrowed out from sleepingout.co.za)

QURAN 50:16

For further reading….

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CLOSER THAN THE JUGULAR

In most religious teachings a similar concept is taught:

1) Creationism

2) God is omnipresent

3) God knows us intimately

4) God connects ❤️ and mind (spirit to soul)

FINALLY THE POINT:

No matter what our individual beliefs are and we each believe we are most RIGHT; similarities prevail. So instead of hating and killing eachother for our differences, LET’S LET US LET THE MOST ACCURATE GOD DECIDE AND JUDGE!

In the meantime let us open our hearts and minds to OUR HOMEWORK.

OUR HOMEWORK IS TO ‘LOVE OUR NEIGHBOURS LIKE OURSELVES’

A VALUABLE LESSON:

The Spirituality of Being Human

1) ACCEPTING OURSELVES AS INDIVIDUALS

To do this we need to objectively turn every stone over. We need to examine what we believe, why we believe it, how we behave & why we behave this way. Accept our flaws and continuously and constructively change what we can whilst remaining, humbly, honest in our short-comings and being open to change.

2) ACCEPTING OTHERS AS INDIVIDUALS IN A TRIBE (WORLD) OF INDIVIDUALS

Very quickly we will see that most of us have a similar flaw…..we each want our RIGHT to be RIGHT as the most RIGHT. This single-handedly will begin the process, if we allow it to, to draw us towards others differences. None of us has the power to be GOD, but each of us has the power to let LOVE prevail in-spite of our differences.

WE EACH HAVE BLOOD THAT FEEDS OUR ORGANS……THE MOST CONFOUNDING HAPPEN TO BE ❤️ & MIND!

3) BEING A PRODUCTIVE MEMBER OF THE TRIBE (WORLD) OF INDIVIDUALS

Being productive has less to do with being the MOST RIGHT as it does with putting our ego’s down to choose the most loving, kind and beneficial way of living that supports a sustainable and equal earth for EACH to freely grow towards the individual purpose they are designed for. MANY ROADS LEAD TO ROME and GOD whether you believe it or not, doesn’t need our help. He chooses to help us by going through things with us…….(we are closer than the jugular….he knows our days before we are born…..namaste)

4) LEAVING A LEGACY

This is the easiest and toughest one……will you be leaving behind hate, rape, murder, theft, greed, gluttony, anger, war, violence, bitterness and unforgiveness or will you be leaving a legacy of self-examination, tolerance of agreeing to disagree, harmonious ‘getting on with eachother’, loving others as equal to ourselves and standing up for ANY form of abuse that creates fear in another to stop freely seeking TRUTH?

NO MATTER WHO YOU OR I THINK WE ARE, WE CAN BE GUARANTEED THAT WE ONLY KNOW A TINY PIECE OF A TINY SOMETHING ON A TINY PLANET IN AN IMMEASURABLE UNIVERSE.

STOP HATE!

❤️ LOVE!!!!!!

I have no actual evidence that there is a next, but in the meantime the experience of GOD that I have had, guides me to continually focus on correcting my flaws as HE guides me towards whatever is next. You or me killing eachother to exert power to prove our point will do anything except create hate and rebellion.

After 13 years of being a BELIEVER, I have yet to be told to hate, kill or harm another. In fact; I get reprimanded if I do have anger or hatred. And, for the sake of peace, considering that Evolution is maybe true…..we are all brothers and sisters. As for my sexuality and my faith……it is a battle that is tough. Do I wish to be straight? No! Do I wish to be gay? No! If I could have it my way….I’d rather avoid any of the argument of ‘sexual’ and focus on loving others no matter what. Until then what will be will be!

WHAT I DO WISH FOR….IS TO LOVE OTHERS AS MUCH AS I AM LOVED.

Your journey towards authenticity is your own to walk, as is mine. Finding truth requires constant stepping out of comfort zones.

Faith/ Economics/Governance of any kind was NEVER meant to be used as a weapon to create hate!!!!!

An interest documentary….

Check out “Michael Lost and Found” on NETFLIX.

mmmmmm….SHAKA ZULU/ DINGAAN NEED I SAY MORE!

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A BIT OF ZULU HISTORY

THE JUGULAR TRAVELS LIFE FROM ❤️ & MIND; USE YOURS WISELY….. CHOOSE ❤️!

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽

AJB•

P.S: pls share!

End’s begINNING

There was a time that I thought ends were ends, over was over, and an innings had been played!

A simple lesson from hair is that it grows, well most of the time. Obviously, there are times where various factors result in hair loss; permanently. I can waffle on for days about alopecia.

One of the most amazing experiences of my life is the drawing to a close having a full head of hair. Yes I can, and might, have hair surgically stitched in to have one last 80’s fringe but it is just not that important to me. I know, I know, I know…..how can I say that as a hairstylist. The truth is that I love playing with other people’s hair but my own……aaaaaargh!

What I am trying to say is simply this!

LIKE HAIR GROWS, AGAIN, AFTER A BAD HAIRCUT, ENDS ARE, SIMPLY, NEW BEGINNINGS.

I had to take my focus off my vanity, and put it into something more solid; even if it is the most fluid thing of all…..the energy of the quality of my heart!

We live in a time where so many ideas, choices, lies, agendas, pretense and illusion are floating around that our ‘love languages’ are misplaced to say the least.

I have spent many years in the school of hard knocks and in the Councillor’s chair learning to put my misplaced love back into it’s rightful place……MY ❤️.

So too from my sleeve and into my chest. I had to learn to love AUTHENTICALLY, with PURPOSE, MYSELF & OTHERS EQUALLY and with TOUGH LOVE.

Tough LOVE says: ‘I mustn’t take responsibility for that which you must and visa-versa; but encouraging, supporting, offering kindness and cheering eachother on towards greater heights!’

Often people over compensate for each other’s issues; that makes us ENABLERS to them staying weak!

So how do we LOVE AUTHENTICALLY?

In other words, HOW WE THINK ABOUT LOVE AND ACT OUT LOVE determines if we love!

LOVE IS A VERB!!!!!

TO HELP US, HERE IS A CHART THAT TEACHES US TO ‘DO LOVE’ TO OTHERS THAT COMMUNICATES AUTHENTIC LOVE!

It is no secret that I am a BELIEVER of GOD. Goodness knows that I may not be the best ambassador of a believer but I am a work in progress……yes, sweetie, daaaaaaaarlin’, honey, angel, babe……just like you…..BUT I AM ACTUALLY VERBING ON IT…..lol.

How does GOD verb ❤️?

IN SHORT:

From experience I have learnt that if I am serving myself, I tend to be impatient to get what I want, trample on the toes of others to get what I want, lie, cheat, feel hard done by and think that it must be ‘MY WAY OR THE HIGHWAY!’

Sound like anyone you know?

No?

Are you sure?

Looked in the mirror lately?

The end of hate brings a world of beginnings. Beginning’s that bring a massive adventure in the fluid energy of authentic tough love! TOGETHER, EACH OF US DOING THIS WE MAY STAND A CHANCE TO HEAL THE WORLD AND HELP THOSE THAT ARE VICTIMS OF OUR PRESENT DISPOSITION OF HATE!!!!!

CHOOSE ❤️!

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽

AJB•

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

The atrocity of political and economic greed, is startling in ‘Viceroy’s House’ I walked out of the Sandton Ster-Kinekor Cinema, flabbergasted whilst sobbing rather undignified. Not to push a point, I got to thinking what the number of people is that have died because of political agenda or the ego of predominantly male led agenda’s. Look girls are not innocent either.

I started searching and according to Wikipedia since 1300 this list is seemingly well informed:

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DEATHS

I started adding up but by the end of list 2, I couldn’t bear knowing anymore. Each and every million, each billion is a HUMAN.

EACH HUMAN DIED BECAUSE OF HATE!

THE BOTTOM LINE IS THAT IN 2017, WE STILL SEEM TO BLAME OTHERS, NOT TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR OUR OWN PART IN SPREADING HATRED, AND CERTAINLY ACT ALL PIOUS WHEN TRUTHS ARE REVEALED.

HATE KILLS!

We are so stubborn, foolish, prideful and arrogant by refusing to look at the facts of our behaviour.

WE ARE ALL BROTHERS AND SISTERS…….1 RACE……THE HUMAN RACE!

AND WORSE STILL IF WE SAY WE BELIEVE IN A GOD

Mmmmmmmm…..

ERIK OF BETTERMAN SAYS THIS:

Strategic Warfare

 

Emotional?

I got this follow up question based on yesterday’s email:

Can a man show emotion whilst in process of gaining confidence?

Yes.

I actually had a long chat to Tim Goodenough (one of our Mentors) about it last week.

Here’s the thing. We are all on the same, but different, journeys.

Do not for one moment be deceived by someones success.

I can tell you that every single man I talk to is fighting his own battle. Just not always in public. In fact, many successful men use success as a mask to hide the fact that they are uncomfortably insecure about who they are.

So, yes, show emotion.

Be authentic.

Be real and honest about where you are and what you are working towards.

I believe it will endear people to you even more and in the process you will also gain their respect because of your determination and patience to stick with the process.

So, yes, be a human being.

Acta non verba,

Erik

Founder of BetterMan

“To share your weakness is to make yourself vulnerable; to make yourself vulnerable is to show your strength.”

― Criss Jami

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽

AJB•

BLOOD FOR BRICKS

It is 3:13AM! Although i can pop a sleep aid I won’t. The threat of becoming addicted to another thing is just too darn horrible to contemplate. Oh trust me, I am no martyr if I really cannot cope then ‘down the hatch’ for that little brat. But, I am coping; in fact better than ever. I wish you guys were here with me, inside my heart, brain, open plan living room of my apartment in Sandown, Johannesburg, South Africa.
Firstly: Thank you for reading my blogs. Can you actually ‘Adam & Steve’ (can you believe it), I am an internationally read blogger…..that is because of you. WOW!
Secondly: I had to walk to the local garage, ciggies ran low, so listening to this mix; my all time absolute favourite mix; I got home jammed as quietly as I could so as to not wake up my new downstairs neighbour.
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Stephan Breuer
Thirdly: My heart is pounding because my Higher Power has decided to wake me at 12 something for a chat. He does this to me sometimes and I know it is going to be brilliant; always is.

SO LET’S BEGIN:

11 months ago, yesterday I wrote this poem (above). Which means that about now, I was in the one of the most earth shattering experiences of my life. My relationship was ending round now. I say this because I have never loved another human besides family, of course, as much as I did this guy. It also means that I was crucifying myself, in a relapse, that was devastating and beautiful all at once. It also means that I was heading towards a very serious GOD encounter. It sounds all super spiritual but for a guy like myself, it is something I get to experience often. I was born psychic. Look it is hardly a fun experience and I wish it helped me to win the lottery, but no such luck. THE POINT IS THIS, I HAD THE MOST HECTIC PICTURE RUN THROUGH ME ROUND-ABOUT ⬇️…..

……THE PICTURE IS THIS: AS I WAS DANCING, QUIETLY BUT FULL ON, I ASKED MY HIGHER POWER TO JOIN ME AND PROTECT ME. I DO THIS BECAUSE DANCING IS A VERY TOUCHY SUBJECT FOR THE ADDICT IN ME. ANYHOW, I SAW THE BLOOD OF LABOURERS RUNNING OVER THE BRICKS OF MY APARTMENT. RIGHT?!?!?!?!!!!!!!!!!!
Immediately, I ripped the earphones out of my ears switched the music off, made some Woolworths brand tea and calmed my nerves.

Let me explain:

I was annoyed so say the least when I woke up at ’12 something’ and couldn’t go back to sleep. Even more annoyed that I had to go by smokes as I was not going to have enough. Annoyed that I have downstairs neighbours, and i couldn’t blow off some steam. (Dancing is my outlet and for a while because I hurt myself I couldn’t dance…..so I was thrilled to jam a bit) Annoyed because I know that sleep is out of the equation till whenever my Higher Power decides our chat is over. I love it when GOD has something to teach me, and us. More so that my blog is a tool he considers using.

After sitting down, tea in hand trying to shut out this hectic picture of blood running down the walls, I ask, “What the hell is that supposed to mean? Am I going to die?” The answer is, “Not yet.” Lol….I mean seriously!!!!!!!!

Getting the idea:

I am a bit slow on the uptake, so my thoughts get taken back to a year ago, roughly, today!!!!! As the penny drops I ball my eyes out and write this poem (above). Slowly it all makes sense and the pounding begins in my chest. This blog is going to either make people hate me more, love me more, be terrified more and or think that I am something that I am not. But, because I am in love with my HIGHER POWER, write it I am.

Do you get the picture….damned if I do, damned if I don’t. All that I do know is that He promises: ‘to use all things to the good of those that believe.’

‘BLOOD FOR BRICKS’

In this blog, ‘🔲🔲🔲🔲hate…..just❤️’, (click ⬇️) I wrote about how I get a feel for the year ahead and how that it was my first time going public about it. In it I listed a few things that I thought would be the result of 2017….
🔲🔲🔲🔲hate…..just❤️

Well it seems to me that I was wrong….or was I? Seriously, I am not even making this up or being sarcastic. Yes, I could’ve gone back and edited myself; WHICH I HAVEN’T. As I am writing this blog I am experiencing it as you are as the reader; firsthand! Do you get why my heart is pounding!!!!!!

Well the blood for bricks is this: OUR HISTORY,GLOBALLY IS STAINED WITH BLOODSHED. OUR EMPIRES HAVE BEEN BUILT BY BLOODSHED. OUR HOMES STAND ON BLOODSHED. THE POINT IS THAT THE CHOICE WE ARE NOW FACED WITH IS WILL WE CONTINUE TO SHED BLOOD OR WILL BE ACKNOWLEDGE THAT WHICH HAS BEEN SHED AND HUMBLY ACCEPT THAT NOT ONE OF US IS DIRECTLY OR INDIRECTLY WHERE WE ARE BECAUSE OF ANCESTRY. WE HONOUR THOSE THAT DIED, STRIVED AND SACRIFICED FOR OUR DNA LINES BY CHOOSING TO TURN THAT BLOODSHED FOR THE GOOD.

How?

So far 2017 has been rough! Right?!?!?!

People are killing eachother, globally, and it seems to be getting worse! Marikana remembered,Charlottesville, Paris,London etc etc.
WELL 2017 IS NOT OVER YET. AN UPRISING HAS BEGUN, GLOBALLY, WHERE CELEBRITIES, POLITICIANS,CEO’s,THE MAN ON THE STREET ARE SAYING: ENOUGH!
In this screenshot (below)from :’🔲🔲🔲🔲hate….just❤️!’, I am reminded that often in life it is in strife that authentic love is found. In hardship we find ourselves. Through bloodshed we stand where WE stand.

Blood for bricks is a plea from GOD for US to stop repeating a history that always ends the same…..WALLS SO HIGH, STAINED WITH BLOOD THAT WE CANNOT SEE THE LOVE BEYOND THE RED HEIGHTS.

Are you, i, US going to just take a chill and forget about who is right or who is wrong and find the common ground to stand proud that others died to teach us HOW NOT TO BE!

We each are a ‘storm in a teacup’, together we are a hurricane, tsunami, earthquake of gigantic proportions….. let’s use it wisely!


IN THE WORDS OF THE KING OF POP, MJ

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HEAL THE WORLD

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽
AJB•

MOM’S MISSION

I GOT THIS RESPONSE TO A BLOG OF MINE ON TWITTER:

WELL BABE, HERE IS MY ANCESTORS ANSWER:

THIS PIC IS SUCH A PROFOUND IMAGE OF HUMANITY…

I see this image every day and today it speaks to my heart. Glasses have different colors, different shapes, different uses but each is useful. Taken to basics, each glass holds something; each human holds a heart!
My Mom was an incredible woman. She would read us Sunday school stories, bake the BEST cookies in the world……still can't find a recipe that tastes like hers did, and sing a song to us over and over again. I will never forget her amazing heart. THE HEART THAT WITHSTOOD ABUSE TO STAND UP FOR LOVING HER CHILDREN.
Thank God she did because if I was left up to the world we live in, I may have never learnt how to love others.

MY MOM❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Don't be fooled by her Irish bush of hair, demure smile and loving eyes…..this woman was fierce. No, not fierce as in vicious, fierce as in ' she could break your stoney heart with simple words like, 'God cries when brothers or sisters fight', or 'He is still your father,' or, 'the devil looks after his own kind,' or, 'everyone is Gods favourite', or, 'she, who is she; she is the cats mother!'
WELL HERE IS THE SONG:
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THE SONG

Today's blog is a small one because my MOM was a woman of few words, and true wisdom never needs to be elaborate. It says what it says and does what it does without pomp, without ceremony!

THE QUESTION IS THIS, HAVE WE FAILED OUR CHILDREN?

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Black and yellow, red and white
They're all precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world

Whether you're rich or whether you're poor
It matters not to Him
He remembers where you're going
Not where you've been

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Black and yellow, red and white
They're all precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world

If your heart is troubled
Don't worry, don't you fret
He knows that you have heard His call
And he won't forget

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Black and yellow, red and white
They're all precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world

All around the world tonight
His children rest assured
That He will watch and He will keep us
Safe and secure

Jesus loves the little children
All the children of the world
Black and yellow, red and white
They're all precious in His sight
Jesus loves the little children of the world

If we are honest with ourselves; all the money, the intellect, the beauty and fame will never satisfy the yearning in our hearts to be understood?!?!?!?!

STAY YOUR AMAZING SELF !

✌🏽
AJB•

Undoing of a Slave

I HAVE A NATURAL AFFINITY FOR THE UNDERDOG!

There are various reasons for this. Growing up in a house where my Dad's moods were unpredictable to say the least , was tough. Do the math… 17 years x 365 days of which a rough estimate of experiencing violence was at about 70% of the time. I phoned my sister to check my facts to make sure that I am not overstating the figure. PLEASE don't feel sorry, we survived and came out tough….lol. The point is this: 'When you fear for your life, you try make yourself as invisible as possible, fight back eventually as you are designed to survive, become a hater of people by brushing all people with the same brush or become empathetic to others because you don't want to be a history repeater; and, through default of circumstances, become a slave to others opinions to try make them love you.

I HAVE BEEN A SLAVE TO MANY THINGS!

(An excerpt from 'Identity Theft', Dr. Rob Spina)

Because I wasn't allowed to experience myself as one should I became a people-pleaser, drug addict, sex addict, love addict, workaholic, GOD addict and worst of all a self-harming 'aholic. The two addictions that I must still conquer are cigarettes and chocolate.

The amazing thing about GOD is that, all of a sudden, I am being granted mercy to experience myself as a human.

I know this sounds strange, but let me explain. For years I was addicted. I merely SLIPT from one addiction to another, quite unbeknownst to me. When each didn't yield the necessary healing I moved onto the the next thing.

But; you are asking; GOD ADDICTION?
I was addicted to the idea that GOD, would wave his magic wand and make me straight, not hurt, and be HEALED of my issues. Well huuuuuuuny, GOD can but he does not choose to work that way. Well not unless he is making a point about something to teach us a lesson about the point he is making. The reason, as I understand it and I cannot speak on his behalf, we are required to do our own personal homework, is that we are designed to be empathetic to others.

WHAT DO I MEAN?
2003 (roughly)
One day, driving past Emperors Palace on my way to my out-patient after-care program, I had this experience:
Me: God, please can I go in and gamble? I really wouldn't mind having a bit of an easy time for a bit. Some money would make this recovery thing so much easier. I wouldn't have to work sooooo hard to make money to try pay the bills, pay for my Councillor, pay for petrol to drive, live in a more uplifting home, go on a holiday and get away from it all for a while. I mean you know that what I am saying is true. I am not asking you to fix me, I tried that but you haven't, I am asking for a chance to fix my mess.
God: My boy, if I did that don't you think that you would keep going back to keep achieving your goals by gambling? Also, babe, let's look at it from my birds eye view…. if I do that for you, isn't it fair then that I do it for everyone as EVERYONE is my child?
YES, I DO TALK TO GOD LIKE THIS AND VISA VERSA. I PROMISE THAT IF YOU HAVE TO ASK RUBY WEBER, IF SHE REMEMBERS, IT TOOK A FEW MOMENTS TO CALM MY NERVES, AS I HAD JUST BEEN TAUGHT THE MOST INCREDIBLE LESSON…..FIRSTHAND.
{I am honestly not making this up. I was in my little canary yellow FIAT UNO driving to HOUSE OF MERCY in Boksburg to see RUBY….I was late as usual and despondent about having to scratch the bits of a life together….I wanted a 'fix it all miracle'.}

Needless to say that I am 43, still gay and progressively taking more and more ownership and responsibility for my own life. I THINK THAT GOD WANTS, PEOPLE WHO ARE LEARNING TO GET OVER THEMSELVES WHO CAN ENCOURAGE OTHERS TO DO THE SAME SO THAT WE ARE NOT SLAVES TO HIM, MONEY, DRUGS, SEX, SELF-PITY, HATE, FEAR, AND INSECURITIES. From my own personal experience, I am seeing that love doesn't avoid issues it takes us through them to teach us about authentic love.

When I was deciding to write this topic called: 'Undoing of a Slave'; I really thought that it was going to be about the perspective of a 'western' human philosophy regarding our ego that thinks it has the answers on how to fix the world.

(The amazing thing is this, WE DON'T! Not one person has the answers to life! When we speak to various people we quickly learn that our perspective is NOT the only accurate one)

A Story:

A client was telling me about how she got fed up of her husbands, seemingly, haphazard way of organizing his clothing. Soooooo, she set about reordering his closet by colour code and shirts, pants, jackets etc. SOUNDS FABULOUS RIGHT?
Well hubby blew a gasket. His 'Closet Philosophy' is: Clothing can be worn 2x if not dirty…..so his system is unworn clothing to the right and 1x worn clothing to the left. The second time clothing went into the wash basket. When he got to the middle and there was nothing to wear then problem. So this innocent deed of reordering the closet meant having to wash everything from scratch as it was impossible to know the unworn from the worn 1x.
This lesson taught my client, her hubby and myself that both systems work and neither can be said to be more accurate.

Bringing it home.

This article (click ⬇️) , that I found when researching my topic about, 'Undoing of a Slave', is a beautiful perspective of a person of colour's point of view about things in an Afrocentric world.
DO YOU HAVE A SLAVE MENTALITY?

Well huuuuuuney, sweetie darling, luuuuuuuvie, bokkie, skat; ne'?

The writer may or may not be tongue-in-cheek in this article. All I do know is that this article is ACTUALLY an insight into every household; be it whatever nationality.

After 23/24 years of hairdressing I can confidently say that each of us suffers from a slave mentality. You see it in our over-exertion in our cars, homes, relationships, careers, social patterns and the way we present ourselves.

IF IT DOESN'T LOOK GOOD, TASTE GOOD, SMELL GOOD, COST GOOD, SOUND GOOD OR FEEL GOOD WE ARE NOT GOOD…. SOUND FAMILIAR.

We spend so much time hiding ourselves through being slaves to opinion that we have become addicted to proving others WRONG. We are creating a mentality that follows certain rules, like sheep, because that is THE NON-SLAVE WAY. Look like a BOSS, act like a BOSS, talk like a BOSS…..

WELL…..

I AM IN A PROCESS OF LEARNING TO TRUST MYSELF, GOD AND LIFE BY ELIMINATING THE INTERPRETATION OF OTHERS OF SUCH….THIS MAKES ME A REBEL…. SO FAR: I HAVE NEVER LOVED GOD, OTHERS AND MYSELF MORE. I AM SEEING THAT WHEN GOD SAYS, "JUSTICE IS HIS," HE MEANS IT AND CERTAINLY DOES IT. I have had to eat humble pie to break my inner slave that has been trying to be EVERYBODY ELSE but me. I was trying to be a BOSS. Yet in my flaws I have learnt to acknowledge the flaws in others too, but LOVE them anyway…..I THINK THIS IS WHAT IS CALLED 'POETIC JUSTICE'.

This following quote says it best:

The undoing of a slave is perhaps asking, "How do we, as a world, become free; together?"

A BIG SONG THAT TEACHES US, SINGULARLY & GLOBALLY ABOUT SAYING SORRY!

(Click⬇️)
SORRY

Stay your amazing self!

✌🏽
AJB•